TinapBeana's Blog: Money Wars!

Alright, the marathon has begun!

Because of my odd situation for this TG, I'm going to try and post updates in here as the day progresses, rather than dump it all into one large post. We'll see how it goes!

So far TG has cost me just over $15. Woohoo!!! DH and I went to the store last night and got onions, garlic, celery, and stuff to make stuffed celery. Since the turkey was free, and that is my only other contribution, things are looking fiscally fine so far.

We took the turkey out for a 'test drive' on the grill and buddy did we get lucky! One roasting pan + one rack + one 20 lb turkey = just barely fits onto my grill.

Ability to cook the meat: CHECK!

DH and I decided to turn the water on in the downstairs bathroom to make the toilet function for the day. The water is off b/c the toilet is leaky and damaging the subfloor, but one day of use isn't going to cause more damage than what's already there. We also went to Home Depot to get a shower curtain rod for the tub down there (as the cat box currently lives in that tub and isn't very pretty). Since we needed the rod anyways, I'm not counting that as a TG expense.

Ability for folks to, um, take care of business: CHECK!

DH replaced the light fixture in the kitchen last night. Took longer than it should have b/c the wiring in our house is older than we are. It was nice of him, since we've had the light and the bulbs for it sitting in the dining room floor since July. After the light fiasco, we cleaned up/cleared out/created organized piles in the living room and dining room.

Ability to walk in the house and easily find one's way to the food: CHECK!

All that's left so far as making the house presentable is washing what's left of the dishes and cleaning the den. That'll be fun: the den is the home of THE CHAIR (and it's entourage of cans, dishes, papers, etc). I think I'm going to be busy in the kitchen while DH works on that!

Other items on the agenda include setting up a table like apparatus in the dining room and covering it with a table cloth so that we may graze the food as we see fit. Folks can eat wherever they sit, party style. I figure since we're not eating anything that requires a knife to cut, it shouldn't be an issue. As for the heat: I'm going to start a fire in the woodstove in a few minutes to knock the chill off, and raise the blings/curtains to take advantage of today's sunshine. Once folks get here, it'll warm up fast.

Ability to stuff our faces in relative comfort: CHECK!

Otherwise: it's now almosr 8:30 EDT. I need to start turkey prep about 9 and have it on the grill by 10 in order to have it off the grill between 2:30 and 3, and ready to eat between 3 and 3:30.

So far, so good. We'll see how it progresses!

Too many things to list here, without doubt, but off the top of my head these are the things I am thankful for:

* Health and happiness.
* Loved ones (blood related or otherwise).
* Finding a wonderful little house to buy and being able to do so within a month of first seeing it.
* Finding a job that I enjoy and am good at right when my severance was ending from my previous position.
* The encouraging words and continuous inspiration from this site.

OK, now that I've gotten the sappiness out of the way, time to share a laugh!

I called my mom last night regarding the rest of our Thanksgiving plans, location, etc. She and my sister have decided that TG should be where the turkey is, and the turkey is in my fridge. So, ready for the laugh?

I will be cooking the turkey when I have no oven, serving dinner for 6 when I have no dining room table, and playing hostess in a home that has no actual heat or functioning public restroom (the working toilet is in the master bath upstairs).

Laughing yet? Glad someone is!!!

Hey, at least he tried, right?

Several days of the week DH has to go to work by 6:30 and gets off around 3 or so. Today was one of those days. Bear in mind he works 5 minutes from the house, so on days like today he could easily be home by 3:15 (or before 3 if no one is watching him!)

I got home from work today at 5:45 and found my DH in the kitchen doing the dishes. WOOHOOOOOOO!!!! Gents, in case you didn't know, few things will make most wives happier than the site of their husband elbow deep in suds at the kitchen sink!

I became bewildered, though, when I realized that though DH had been home for 2.5 hours and was cold enough to sit in his chair under a blanket, he at no point made a fire. It was 53 in the house when I walked in.... As my family says CTRL-A Brrrrrr shit!.

And that is why DH gets an 'E' for effort (because he made the effort to do the dishes) but doesn't get an 'A': because he didn't think to actually take care of the important stuff first (like preventing hypothermia). For those that are curious, this is the first time I've seen DH do dishes in this house, and we moved in exactly 3 months ago today. Hey, maybe that's why he did 'em!

'Tis the season for gifting and such
If you're like me, you might buy too much!

So here's a small list of nice things to make.
Since I have no oven, there's nothing to bake!

Microwave Peanut Brittle

http://www.cooks.com/rec/view/0,167,147166-231203,00.html

Cream Cheese Mints (think butter mints)
http://allrecipes.com/recipe/cream-cheese-mints/detail.aspx

Chocolate Dipped Whatever (pepermint sticks, pretzels, store-bought butter cookies, spoons)
I use a chocolate glaze recipe whenever I dip stuff
http://allrecipes.com/Recipe/Chocolate-Glaze-I/Detail.aspx

No-Bake Cookies: These are p-nut butter, and can be dipped or spread with the chocolate glaze above
http://allrecipes.com/recipe/no-bake-peanut-butter-cookies-i...

Spice Mixes:
Jerk Rub
http://allrecipes.com/Recipe/Jerk-Seasoning/Detail.aspx
Rice Seasoning Mix
http://allrecipes.com/Recipe/Rice-Seasoning-Mix/Detail.aspx
Cajun/Creole Mix
http://allrecipes.com/Recipe/Cajun-Seasoning-Mix/Detail.aspx

Infused Oils
http://allrecipes.com/Recipe/Infused-Olive-Oil/Detail.aspx
http://allrecipes.com/Recipe/Italian-Herb-Infused-Olive-Oil/...
http://homecooking.about.com/library/archive/blcon3.htm

Herbed Vinegars
http://homecooking.about.com/cs/atozfoodindex/ht/herb_vinega...
http://www.giftsfromyourkitchen.com/vinegar/perfect-herbed-v...
http://www.mealsmatter.org/recipes-meals/recipe/23699
http://www.cdkitchen.com/recipes/recs/5/Herbed_Vinegar45396....
http://www.homemade-gift-basket-ideas.com/herbed-vinegar-rec...

Sorry, Blueknitter, I couldn't come up with anything better. Not trying to steal your title, I promise!

Just a few highlights from this weekend.

The house was a wreck when my mother came over. DH made a valient effort to appear industrious by starting his laundry when she arrived. Apparently this effect snowballed, as he finished all of his laundry by Sunday night. Sweet!

Mom and I headed out about 11 or so, and got caught at a light where traffic was blocked by cops. We were worried there was an accident, but it turns out we got there right as the Toys for Tots motorcycle ride was getting underway. We got to spend 15 minutes watching every imaginable kind of bike flow out of the designated parking lot and onto the main thoroughfare. Folks were dressed up, bikes were decorated with tinsel, there was even a Santa bringing up the rear! It was absolutely awe inspiring, there had to be several hundred bikes participating. The sound was indescribable. All these people in cars around us were acting all irritated, like the thought the bikers were just out galavanting around up to no good. I hope they saw the news coverage and felt bad, but I doubt it.

First stop was the ATM. When I pulled up to the drive-up ATM, there was a Captain Morgan's mini-bottle perched on the ledge. How stupid do you have to BE?!?!?? Even better: the ATM gave me $155 in FIVES!!!!!!!!!!!! OMG, my mom and I about died laughing, my wallet was absolutely bursting!

Stopped at PetSmart to get catfood. They still didn't have the litter I liked. We stayed there 2 hours because they were adopting out Death Row dogs (to be put down today if not adopted). Neither one of us has a fenced yard to be able to properly care for a dog right now, but we stayed that long to make sure the one dog least likely to get adopted found a home. Tears my heart up to see animals facing the end like that, and I hated that I couldn't help more. Yes, I cried in PetSmart. Almost crying now, and I'm sitting at my desk at work...

Finally left PS and got to the grocery store WAY behind schedule. Total spent between my mom and me $87.56. Total Savings (not counting reduced for quick sale meat) $51.50!!! Included in that savings is our FREE 20 POUND TURKEY! It's friggin' huge...

Was late to my meeting with the gentleman writing the book. The dear man tried to do some of the formatting himself, and has virtually undone everything I had previously fixed. 368 pages worth.... Oh dear....

Tried to avoid a headache after that meeting, so DH and I ate Mexican for dinner. 2 people plus tip less than $18.

Passed the new StarCrooks on the way to dinner. They opened on Saturday, so DH and I both flipped the store off from the comfort of the truck! After dinner it was off to the cigar store. Talked to my dad about StarCrooks and the Local-Hero-Coffee-Shop. A friend of our family owns the bakery that provides Local-Hero their muffins, and my former BIL is their delivery guy (jeez, I just realized how mob-like my family sounds!!!). Anyways, we're going to see if Local-Hero would be interested in partnering up w/ our cigar store. Basically, folks get a receipt from Local-Hero and bring it in to the cigar store, dad'll pay them their sales tax back. Encourage people to shop local, maybe bring in some more foot traffic to our store...

Yesterday was a no spend day. Mostly because I felt like a slug and did my best live to my full slug potential. Breakfast was coffee, lunch was breakfast (bacon and flapjacks), dinner was imprompteau spaghetti.

I did rake leaves for about an hour, but that only resulted in 3 piles of leaves and a desparate need for a tarp and a bigger compost heap. Seriously, there's no way I can compost the 5 years worth of leaves on my property, so some will have to be put on the curb. Guess that's why this coming weekend is a long weekend

Had a few things pop into my head to add to my list

* I drive a stick, it's what I learned on. The mileage is better, it's more fun, and truckers and buses full of high school boys all stare in wonderment when I zoom down the highway  

* My boss is only a few years older than me, but is an ex-marine and a former Ultimate Fighter. Lotsa good stories.

* I had a mild form of scarlet fever when I was in fifth grade.

* I represented my state in the 1989 Nationa History Day competition in Washington DC. They mixed up my scores with someone elses, so I will never know how I would have placed.

* I really like plants but have never been a successful gardener. Depressing!

* When I get angry I feel it physically, not just emotionally; it's like a big pit of angry energy. Once my physical energy is spent, I no longer feel as angry. In the past I have dealt with this by focusing my physical anger on crunches and pushups: during my senior year in high school, I was up to over a thousand crunches a day. Now I am considering get an 80 lb body bag to hang in my back-yard.

I have a love/hate relationship with weekends. I love them because they abound with time and possibility. I hate them because I usually wind up doing mundane meaningless crap I don't feel like getting to during to week.

And thus the segue into today's strategy

My mother is coming over at about 10 this morning, so that's in 40 minutes. I've given up getting the house straightened, the dishes done, or the floors swept before she gets here. Luckily, my mother keeps a plaque on her wall that says "My house was clean yesterday, Wish you could have seen it!", so I don't think she'll mind too much! That, and I'm secretly hoping this will shame DH into getting his butt in gear and helping around the house. Unfortunately, the liklihood of this happening is slim to none, and slim just walked out the door...

*sigh* Not gonna start the housework rant again. All it does is get me frustrated and depressed and feeling like a single mom. Which is weird, as I'm 28 with no kids.

Anywho, my mom is coming over because we have a plan of attack for Thanksgiving shopping. Woohoo, attack attack! My favoritist grocery store has a special till Tuesday: buy $50 in groceries, get a free 10 lb turkey. While I could easily find $50 in stuff to buy, I don't need $50 in stuff. So mom and I are heading to the store together to shop to TG and put all our bits onto one ticket, to make sure we each only get what we need and can still hit the $50 mark. Pretty frugal, no?

I also will hit 5 other stores at some point, though perhaps not today. Walgreens has my deoderant BOGO (one week after CVS, I wonder if it's about to be discontinued?). Publix has Coke products on sale, CVS has Kashi cereal on sale, and I need cat food from PetSmart. Oh, and coffee from Garner's. Sounds like a lot of driving around, but all are within a 4 mile radius. I love living near downtown! I would also love living in the country, but that will have to wait for a time in my life when I'm able to run errands during the week, not just on the weekend.

This afternoon will be spent in a meeting. Yes, a meeting, on the weekend. Grrrrrrrrrr.... I'm helping a cigar customer/friend format a book that he is going to publish, which is pretty cool. Even get to do the cover design myself, also cool.

Not cool is the fact that said friend, brilliant as he is at financial forecasting, is about 80 yrs old working on a 6 year old PC and has no real clue what he's doing when it comes to computers. Let's put it this way: there are 75 tables in the book, and he made them all look like tables by lining text up using spaces, rather than actually creating tables. FORMATTING NIGHTMARE!!! Plus he's using a older version of Word, which winds up messing most if not all of the formatting corrections I make during any given revision.

Absolute frustration in 10... 9... 8... 7... You get the picture. Not a particularly fun way to plan on spending a Saturday afternoon.

And thus is the outline of today's strategy. Tommorow? Who knows about tomorrow: it too abounds with time and possibilities. Most likely, though, it will involve a trip to Home Depot for an axe/maul combo and some serious leaf raking. yay =/

Frequent readers may recall my husband is, um, fiscally challenged. Perhaps a more apt description is to say, given the opportunity, money slips through his hands like water through a sieve. It's a classic love story: saver meets spender, saver marries spender, saver goes through boughts of wanting to throttle spender within an inch of his life. Nothing too abnormal.

Well, we all know that earlier this week DH found a great deal on golf clubs and actually put them on layaway with his own allowance. Deep down inside I did a mighty fist-pump and hissed Yeeeeeeeeessssssssssssss!!! I tasted victory, and it was sweet.

Since then, there have been a few interesting developments, and I'm now starting to think that a little tiny grey alien has taken residence inside my husband's brain and is controlling his every action.

Exhibit A:
DH mentioned in the last week or two he'd be interested in going to one of the NASCAR racing schools. We researched it, found the program he'd like, and I told him that it might have to be his birannimas present for the whole year (birthday + anniversary + Christmas) and I'd need till June to save for it. No problem. A day or two ago, though, he oh-so-casually mentioned that the more he thought about it, the more he might want LASIK as his birannimas present for 2007. Um, excuse me? He's choosing Lasik (something practical and likely to save us money in the long run) over 35 laps at Lowe's Motor Speedway riding 600 horsepower? Something's wrong.

Exhibit B:
Last night when he came home from pool, he mentioned that a friend of ours might be interested in buying our canoe. This is the canoe that is sitting in my den right now, the one we bought in September after he told me he'd wanted one for 20 years (he's 27, so I suppose it is possible he did actually yearn for one for 2 decades). The kicker? His next statement was that we could take the $500 from the boat and put it towards the Lasik fund. He actually used the word 'fund', without any prompting or pointed looks. This is supremely odd behavior for my spouse. When we moved out of our rental house in July, DH took our $500 deposit refund and bought his 6th (7th?) gun with it before I knew what happened. Now he's volunteering to sell something he's wanted for 2 decades and put the proceeds into a 'fund' for a practical birannimas present?!?? I almost checked him for a fever...

Exhibit C:
I sent DH a wish-list of camera stuff I would like for Christmas. Items, pictures, prices, model numbers, the website, and the shipping costs. Pretty up-front, but that's the way it's got to be sometimes. There were actually 2 lists: one was all Sony bits since I have a Sony camera (aka the actual WISH list). The other was a lesser known brand with decent reviews where all the bits come with a 10 year guarantee (aka the THIS'LL DO list). After shipping, the Sony list came to $90 over the alloted 'spend on Tina' Christmas money and the other list was $9 over. After reviewing the list, DH found a third option: an off-brand that had a lifetime guarantee but was waaaaaaaaaaay cheap and had no good reviews that I could find. DH's argument was that he could get me more bits for the buck, so to speak. I asked him if he would buy a cheap pool cue just because it had a lifetime guarantee as opposed to a well-made cue that cost more, and he promptly said 'No!'. After a few seconds he asked if I would be happy with the Sony bits; I of course said "Yes, but it's more than what the house has allotted for my Christmas gift". "I'll take care of it" he said...

Is it possible, just maybe, that my husband is starting to see the 'method to the madness', so to speak? That one must consider value over price, that owning something does not mean it brings you joy, that there can be greater satisfaction found in a practical life-changing choice than in most frivolous splurges?

Part of me wants to believe that there is actually a shift taking place, but the other part of me thinks this might just be a phase and things will revert back to pre-alien normalcy at any moment.

Dammit man!

Yes, the Weather Channel is STOOPID! I say this because last night, and again this morning, they listed the weather in my area "High 54, Low 55". WHAT THE FOO?

For those that are wondering, 'foo' has been used in programming text books since the beginning of time to represent whatever the variable de jour is. I find FOO makes an excellant non-offensive expletive when around children, the highly religious, and in my blog where I'm still trying to maintain a sense of decorum. In real life, my language is unfortunately not so sanitized...

I keep going back to everyone's list to catch up on all the comments. See, folks keep adding stuff in the comments that ought to be on the list. Like getting stabbed with a pencil, Price's scented candles, or the fact that I now feel like the only non-Asian violin player here. On a side note, I find it interesting that I apparently had no ethnicity assigned to my fellow blog-mates. At any rate, I'm having a BLAST reading about everyone. Someone mentioned it being vouyeristic, and I kinda agree. But at the same time, I think it makes every seem so much more human. I'm debating about starting a category in my blog for 'My List' so that when I think of things to add, I can put them there and folks can peruse at will. Maybe we could lobby Jeff'n'Nate to have a 'My List' area like there is for the $20 challenge.

For those that like the trick of hiding the personal information in the blog (so others don't have to read it if they don't want to), change the color of your text to match the white background.
[color= white]Type Your Stuff Here[/color] Just take out the space in "= white". The text becomes visible when you type CTRL-A on your keyboard, or when you highlight it with your mouse.

Try it here!
Gotcha!

And, to tie this back into finances somehow (desparate attempt to remain on topic, yes?): I'm tweaking yet another way to view my budget. It's still in the early phases, but I'll post more when I get it finished. Right, like it'll ever actually be "finished"

I started stashing the change and dollar bills from my allowance 10/12. Here's my progress:

----------------------------------------------
PREVIOUS TOTAL
----------------------------------------------
  $ 94.73 total as of 11/9
- $  0.00 reward for 1W1G (haven't braved the car wash yet)
---------
  $ 94.73
----------------------------------------------
THIS WEEK
----------------------------------------------
  $ 26.00 dollar bills
  $  3.75 quarters
  $  1.60 dimes
  $  0.35 nickels
  $  0.22 pennies
  $118.64 MILEAGE REIMBURSEMENT BABY!
---------
  $150.56 total this week
----------------------------------------------
  $245.49 total as of 11/16

Stupid peer pressure!

"Make a list, everyone else is!"
"But I don't wanna..."
"Sure you do. All the cool bloggers are doing it..."
"But what if my list is stupid and boring?"
"Make something up!"

After that conversation with myself, I felt a little better about making my list

Some of this is personal, but the text is written in white so you won't be able to see it/get offended by it unless you follow the key commands given

So, who am I?

I’m the only person I know who actually did have to walk uphill both ways to catch the school-bus! I grew up in a rural mountainous area, and our driveway was almost half a mile long, and was in fact uphill whichever way you went.

Never had a lot of friends when I was younger: everyone knew I did well in class & assumed I spent all my spare time studying. Ironically, I just absorb really well and usually just did my homework between classes.

Played soccer for three years in high school on the men's varsity team, since we didn't have a women's team. In the south soccer is a spring sport, so I was out there with all the football players who used soccer as a training regimen. OUCH!

Took ballet, tap, jazz & modern dance from age 8-15. Was up to about 8 hours per week, plus teaching ballet another hour or 2 per week.

Moved out at age 16 to attend my state’s science and math magnet school 180 miles away. There were 65 in my graduating class, we were the largest they’d ever had. 23 of us were national merit scholars, and as a class we were offered a total of over 7 million in scholarships. Since we were required to keep track, I know my personal total was right around a quarter million in offers; sadly, I sometimes feel I accepted the wrong one.

Majored in Psychology with a minor in Violence Studies. The plan was to go to a joint PhD/JD program and work as a behavioral scientist/feeb, but we all see how that worked out.

Played the violin for about 8 years. I gave it up after one grueling and embarrassing rehearsal with the Atlanta Youth Symphony.

Click Ctrl-A on your keyboard to see the personal stuff that is included below

I have been asked to marry every man I’ve slept with. Not that there are that many, but enough for me to find it very odd…

Did actually marry one of them: DH (duh, right?) My first, his second. We got married the day before I flew out for a month in Argentina. Frequent readers may find this interesting: his first marriage ended because she cheated on him…

I am an American Mutt when it comes to heritage, although German and Cherokee are the most prevalent.

I speak butchered Spanish, but find I can read and understand about 50-60% of any romantic language.

Since I was so active as a youth, I now have marginally bad knees and higher than average muscle mass. All height-weight charts say I’m overweight verging on obese, even though I am a size 8 with pokey collarbones and visible ribs. This also makes me say “Dammit Man!”

I love taking pictures. I’m getting pretty good at it, and I’m hoping the list of lenses along with shipping charges I put together for DH will be enough of a hint as to what I want for Christmas DH puts it this way: he could take a picture of a rock and there it is, yup, that’s a picture of a rock. I take a picture of a rock and it’s like it’s art…. See, you all knew I stuck around for a reason!

I love to read, but I get sucked in very quickly. When I first moved back to SC and didn’t have a job, I was up to 3 books or 900 pages a day. For a month. Needless to say I literally cannot afford my reading habit if I had to actually buy books.


OK, I think I’m going to quit now and go read other people’s lists!

Everyone, sing along to the tune of "I Feel Pretty..."

I feel SNOTTY
Oh so SNOTTY
I feel SNOTTY
And ROTTY
and BLUUUUUUUUUUUUUUH!

Yes, instead of snotty I did almost go with something that would in fact rhyme with 'pretty', but I thought the better of it

I'm actually not that wonky this morning, but the song 'I Feel Pretty' started snaking its way through my head yesterday morning. The more I thought about it, the more it annoyed me, and I decided that stupid song is way too freakin' chipper!!!

So, I wanted an antedote, and the above jingle is what I came up with.

Well, my

'coffee shop at home' post went over well, and apparently has gotten at least one person off of a tea kick. Sorry! So, to make up for it, I decided to create a 'Yummy Tea' post.

First of all, my absolutely favorite teas come from Stash Tea. They're available at some grocery stores, you can order online, or get a catalog. An absolutely HUGE variety of teas: black green white blend herbal, loose or bagged, organic or not. It's like the Sears Wishbook of tea.

Next is determining how 'into' tea you are. When I'm in a tea mood, I want a couple of mug fulls and therefore making it a cup at a time gets a bit annoying. I bought a French press tea pot at an outlet store a couple of years ago and it's perfect for me.

OK, interesting ways to prepare tea... These are some of my personal favorites, but any others you'd like to add in the comments are of course appreciated!

Black Chai: I like this just about any way I make it!!! One of my favorites, though, is to warm up vanilla soy milk for steeping the tea. It comes out creamy and just a touch sweet, and is an easy way to work soy milk into my diet.

Orange Cider: I threw this together when I was sick a couple of years ago and have stuck with it ever since! I was brewing Constant Comment (aka orange spice), and it wasn't 'orangy' enough for me. So I heated up 2/3 OJ to 1/3 water plus some cinnamon in a mug in the microwave. You'll have to stir occasionally to get the cinnamon to mix in. Once hot, steep a bag of tea in the liquid, then add honey to taste. YUM!!! Get creative, and think of other juices you could use to give your tea some extra oomph: cranberry, apple, and mango all come to mind as tasty candidates.

The Classic Hot Tottie: Good when you're starting to feel sick or when you're going to spend a quiet evening at home next to the fire. Basically, hot tea with honey and lemon juice and a splash of whiskey/bourbon/scotch. Cheaper than Nyquil!

By 10p Tuesday 11/21 I will...

Stick to the cleaning schedule I created for One Week, One Goal #4.

Lot's of stuff rolling around in my head today, so rather than a post here and a post there, I figured I'd dump it all into one rambling meaningless entry. Much easier for folks to skip that way if need be

The Discovery channel has a show called 'Modern Marvels' where they pick an item, event, or person and talk about how history has changed as a result of *insert noun here*. Last night was the telephone. I used to train CS for a national phone company, and actually met DH when he worked at that same place.

Anyways, having both worked for a phone company DH and I were interested in the show, although a lot of it was not-new information. What struck us was the first transatlantic phone call wasn't possible until 1956 (about 70? 80? years after the invention of the phone), but less than 20 years later transatlantic calls were being bounced off of a satellite. 80 years to string a cable across the pond, then 20 years to figure out how to bypass the cable altogether...

The next thing that got me thinking was the introduction of touch tones. What do you think: would the internet have been invented if there hadn't been touch-tone capability? The more I thought about it, the more I started to really believe that home computers, internet, cordless phones, cell phones, PDAs, GPS, and so much more really owe their existence to the simple little invention of touch-tone calling.

It was an interesting train of thought, and one I jumped off of until the SA site was temporarily unavailable earlier today. This happened shortly after the internet went down in my office; when the internet goes down, so does our phone system.

These two things pointed out very clearly to me that I am without doubt a computerized person. I work at a software company on a computer all day, my job requires internet access to solve problems and access systems all around the world. The phones require internet service. My preferred personal methods of entertainment are computer and internet based. I worked my way through college at both an internet start-up and as part of the IT department.

I can honestly say, without doubt, that I wouldn't be where I am or even who I am without computers. The only thing that has affected my life as much as computers are my parents.

Weird...

Any rate, moving on in my rambling post to money. I think DH is maybe, perhaps starting to get it a little!!!

His first wakeup call was when he found out I'm saving $ from my allowance to buy part of his Christmas present (that's part of what I've decided to do with the

change and buck bucket). He felt bad and said I should just use more house money. I calmly explained that I was using as much house money as was budgeted, and since I'd decided to get him something more expensive it was my responsibility to cover the difference.

Now, imagine the Wimbledon announcer saying "FIFTEEN LOVE, TINA"

Next came his realization that, even though I get less allowance than him and am even saving some of my allowance, I always have more allowance left than he does. "THIRTY LOVE, TINA"

Last night was the culmination of those and other small revelations on his part. After dinner (which the house allowance paid for), we went to a sporting goods store. He wants golf clubs... I held my tongue, not a peep from me! He didn't say much as we were looking around but I got the feeling he was waiting for the 'house' to volunteer to pay. It was hard, but all he got was silence on my part. "FORTY LOVE, TINA"

He found a great deal on some clubs: buy 1 get 2 free. For the quality, it was a steal and a half! I still managed to keep quiet. "MATCH POINT, TINA"

After he pondered for a while, he looked at me and said "I wonder if they do layaway? I'm pretty sure I can get enough out of my allowance ever 2 weeks to cover these..."

GAME, SET, MATCH BABY!!!

The Duh-Huh is just something funny that happened at work. Today is November 14th. We have a client with some pretty intricate software/database/website stuff we created and support when it messes up. I get a ticket from this company saying Such-and-Such report is supposed to run 2 times a week on Wednesday's and Friday's, and the last time it ran was 11/10. Therefore, the report hasn't run properly on 11/15 and 11/17....

OK, who can spot the 'error' that was causing this? ....

AND NOW FOR A SURPRISE FOR MY READERS!!!

As a 'thank-you' for making it through my rambling post, I am going to tempt the blog police by posting something ugly and shameful: pictures of DH's pumpkin colored chair and the area around it...

VIEW AT YOUR OWN RISK. Sorry in advance, blog police!

Read about My "One Week, One Goal" quest here

Also, visit the new thread

Text is "What is Your Goal This Week?" and Link is http://www.savingadvice.com/forums/showthread.php?t=22948

"What is Your Goal This Week?" to see what other folks are doing!

Text is The Goal: and Link is http://tinapbeana.savingadvice.com/2006/11/08/one-week-one-goal-4_16941/

The Goal:
By 10p Tuesday 11/14 I will...

Finish last week's goal of organizing the pantry! Also, I will create a viable schedule for reining in the household chores.

The Result:
The pantry is close enough! I'm fighting a losing battle with this, b/c DH like sto put things back any old place he reaches first, so I'm pretty much shifting stuff around on a daily basis. I'm going to mull this over to find a better system for the future, but for now I call it done!

As for the cleaning schedule, I went back to the site that gave me my original jumping off point for my old house. I like the theory of it, and while I would love for my home to be spotless it's pretty much just me cleaning up after an adult (me), a child in a grown man's body (DH), and 3 cats. ACK! I never thought I'd say this, but I almost wish I had kids I could give chores too!! I'm including my new schedule below. For those that are curious, I made my 'busy' days the days DH usually spend at home together as I'm hoping he'll ask me why I don't sit down and relax a little bit. Cheesy I know, but I've about run out of options! Thursday's are his pool night, and I've decided to take that as my 'me' night, and therefore there will be no extra cleaning going on.

Text is The Reward: and Link is http://tinapbeana.savingadvice.com/2006/10/23/1w1g-rules-update_16073/

The Reward:
I'm going to treat myself to a car-wash and a vacuum. Yes, it's for my car! Otherwise, I'd never have the $0.75 needed to vacuum out my car since all my change goes in the bucket!

SUNDAY
BA Sinks
Wipe stovetop

MONDAY
BA Sinks
Wipe stovetop

TUESDAY
BA Sinks
Wipe stovetop
Garbage
BA Mirrors
Toilet
Clean shower
BA mop
Dust-mop Upstairs
Straightening up

WEDNESDAY
BA Sinks
Wipe stovetop

THURSDAY
BA Sinks
Wipe stovetop

FRIDAY
BA Sinks
Wipe stovetop

SATURDAY
BA Sinks
Wipe stovetop
Garbage
Shake out Rugs
Dust-mop Downstairs
KIT Sweep
KIT Mop
Straightening up

Dusting - 1x every other week
Spot-cleaning walls etc. - 1x every month
Dusting out of reach - 1x every month
Washing walls - 1x every year
Dusting blinds - quarterly

Yup, I had a Homer Simpson moment. You know the ones: where you slap your hand on your head (or feel like you should) and wonder "Where was my head?!?".

I was updating my check register with the last round of automated payments, and couldn't figure out why my register and the bank's website were different. Granted, I round all my checks up to the next dollar which means my register is always going to show a little less than the bank, but not almost $200 worth! Kept looking and looking and looking...

Turns out I had decreased the $$$ amount on 2 of my automated payments on the bank website, but hadn't decreased them in my budgeting software. DOH! For those that are wondering, I had been paying double/triple/quadruple the minimum payment on a lot of my debt until last month, when I changed the strategy to saving as much as possible until the end of the year to create an EF and pay for Christmas/property taxes on the house.

Hey, I only bought the house in July, so it's not like this was a budgetary line item I had been ignoring... Christmas, however, is a different story. I choose to stick my fingers in my ears and and sing LALALALALALALA while everyone asks why I've not been saving for Christmas all year long. I've got two letters for you: DH!!!

At any rate, the mystery was solved, I felt much less stupid, and all was well with the world.

On the brighter side: my lunch out and coffee this afternoon cost a lot less than expected. The burrito lady rang up my order, punched my card, says "Now you have enough punches for a free entree!" credited part of my bill, then got out another card and punched it too!! WooHOO! PLUS I had filled up my punch card for the Local-Hero Coffee Shop, and got my coffee for free. Monster Heavy D Taco, chips, cheese dip, drink, and coffee for $2.55 instead of $7.64.

Frugality, thy name is Loyalty Cards!

Here it is, about a month from official winter, and below are pictures of my rose and camillia in my front yard. I love livin' in the south!

At least around here, that is.

See, I was all set for a nice quiet weekend. I knew I needed to head out for a bit yesterday because a) I needed milk and onion powder b) The checkout girl at CVS had mentioned she'd seen my aluminum-free Adidas deoderant at the Dollar Tree (normally $3.29 each & she mentioned this as I was getting it as a BOGO special) c) I wanted to head to a store called Old Time Pottery to get 2 more of the wool/cotton doormats ($4.99 vs retail $18.99!). No problems, all these places are within 2 miles of my house. I got steak and shrimp out to thaw for dinner (more later YUM!) and headed out.

Stop One: Dollar Tree: They did not have my deoderant. No big whoop, since I'd just bought 4 tubes BOGO, but it still would have been nice. They did have some interesting linen spray and candles that looked much nicer than $1 and a plethora of the Pirouline style cookies, so I picked up a linen spray, candle, and canister of cookies each for $3 before tax. I wanted to 'test drive' them, as it were, because if they're worth a darn I'll stock up and make up some gift boxes to keep on hand. The verdict: cookies are YUM, and the linen spray spells very nice (if you're into vanilla, me not so much). So I'll be heading back for some more of each, and get some $5 gifts (including packaging!) stashed away.

Stop Two: Old Time Pottery.

HOLY !@#$ WHERE DID ALL THESE *&#$(^@ PEOPLE COME FROM?!?!?!????

They were everywhere, packed into this store like animals being led to slaughter. Shuffling up and down the aisles, stoned from the scented candles and cinnamon brooms, carts overflowing with every red, green, gold, and ivory knick-knack and whatchamajigger they could pick up.

This is where I realized: I'm stupid, and everyone else here is absolutely insane.

Luckily the holiday rugs weren't in the regular rug section, so I fought my way back and tried to enjoy the relative peace. Found my two rugs, and also picked up a wool dust-mop refill and bag of buttercreme scented tea-lights on sale. The candles will last me a year, until they go on sale again.

Stop Three: PetSmart. I really hate this store. I spotted a dead hamster in their hamster display once and spent 10 minutes trying to find someone I could tell to remove it, so now every time I go in I have to check all the hamsters as part of my attempt at keeping children from being scarred for life.

I also hate that they're the only store that carries the food my cats like and the litter my DH likes. And this time, they didn't have either one of them. ARGH!!! This litter is made from dehydrated orange peels and is the only thing that completely hides the smell without smelling like a poopy pissed-on flower bed (sorry for the visual!). It's like a crap shoot as to when the store wil have it in stock (sorry for the pun!).

Someone had emailed me about a post where I mentioned using Feline Pine, and I do like the stuff. Unfortunately, it can't hold a candle to this orange peel litter. Oh well, I'll have to make another trek later this week and buy all they have once it's finally back on the shelves.

Stop Four: Garner's Natural Market and Cafe. A safe haven from the weirdo Christmas zombies. Picked up onion powder, milk from a local dairy, 32 bean and barley soup, and 4 lbs of organic clearance pasta. A great way to end a very frustrating trip out.

Spent the rest of last night trying to recover. I cooked 1 lb of shrimp and about 1.5 lbs of steak (4 total, since this is how they were packaged and frozen), and dinner was a massive amount of surf & turn along with herbed corn and wild rice pilaf with lentils. TOtal cost for the meal was between 10-15 dollars and I could have easily fed 4 people, but now I have surf&turf leftovers for lunch next week. Classy!

Today has been a no-spend day and I've done nothing productive other than poke around the board. The night is still young, though. Breakfast was venison sausage biscuits wit sauteed onions. DH got bored around 1 and wanted to head out, so I mentioned we could try the metal detector we borrowed from his dad. He wanted to head to a local park (which I know would mean stopping somewhere and spending something on the way), so I asked if we could try it in the backyard first. I've never done it and actually need to find 2 of the cats' collars back there anyways. After about an hour we found part of an electric motor, a nail, a bolt, one of the cat collars, a dart, a long piece of iron, some buried barbed wire, and some metal plant tags. DH was bored at that point and went inside to watch TV.

Anyways, tonight's supper will not consist of the pork picnic roast I managed to char on the grill. Stupid hot grill! It's no problem, since I had 2 hamhocks just waiting to go into a pot of beans, not to mention the 32 bean and barley soup I bought. So that's simmering away right now, and I'm trying to get up enough motivation to be productive. My luck, I'll find it about an hour before bedtime and won't be able to sleep...

So weird: it was almost 80 yesterday. ACK!!! And I was wearing courdery and a sweater, I almost roasted in my own office!

Today is still unseasonably warm, with a high expected of 73. Monday morning is supposed to be in the 30s. One of the downsides of living in the south: 40-50 degree temperature swings are not unheard of.

At any rate, this is throwing a monkey wrench in my strategy when it comes to cooking. I have on hand idaho potatos, chicken stock, ham hocks and a picnic roast, dried beans, butternut squash, etc. All kinds of yummy cold weather food. I think my warm weather capabilities include ice cream and frozen fish...

At any rate, I believe the time has come to begin working on the Christmas list. So, off I go to eat something cool, put on my shades, and get in the holiday mood!

This is something I like to think about when I get bored. As it is super-quiet at work right now, and I have nothing better to do, I am going to ponder what I would do if I won the lottery.

First let me say I'm talking a goodly sized lotto here, none of that mamby-pamby under 7 figure stuff. Come on, if you're gonna dream, dream big!

1. Pay a crap-load of taxes, and not care because this is free money. Uncle Sam: Check!

2. Convince DH that we will need to legally change our names (slightly) so we can still live where we are undistrubed rather than having to pick up and move.

3. Split a million up into separate accounts at separate banks so it would be FDIC insured. Have all interet generated deposited into another separate account just for the joy of seeing how much interest I would earn every month. Emergency Fund: Check!

4. Pay off all of mine and DH's debt. Debt Elimination: Check!

5. Split the remainder 50% me and DH, 25% friends and family, 25% charitable donation. Place an accountant in charge of the F&F portion with strict instructions to call DH or me anytime anyone attempts to access the money (otherwise we'll have F&F we never even knew about!). This money will be assumed lost once it leaves the building. Place another accountant in charge of the charitable donation funds, with instructions to invest them and donate dividends/revenue/interest every month to a list of pre-approved organizations in pre-approved percentages. Have accountant one and two send monthly reports to Head Honcho Accountant who will manage the remaining funds for DH and me and hopefully be a wiz at tax deductions *grin*.

6. Go to DH's office and watch him light a smoke, take a shot of tequila, and quit on the spot. Do the same at my office (except vodka, not tequila), with an offer to do contract work if absolutely needed.

7. Hire a landscaper to overhaul my yard (crack shack included!).

8. Hire a general contractor to replace the roof, install solar panels, install solar collecting storm windows, a mac-daddy on-demand water heater, renovate the kitchen, replace my leaky toilet and the sub-floor beneath it, and scrape and paint all the walls and trim in the house.

9. Hire my mom to be there to ride the GC's arse to make sure the job is done right!

10. Take DH and the cats on a month-long trip to Buenos Aires while the house is being renovated. Eat fork-tender steak daily and do my part to boost the Argentine economy by purchasing leather goods and silver/garnet jewelry.

11. Move back into my house, because I like it.

12. Encourage DH to open a pool hall, something he says is a dream of his.

13. Get into real-estate with my mom. We enjoy going to the foreclosure sales anyways (they're held once a month about a mile from my house). I'll provide the start-up capital, she'll be the property manager, and maybe TLC or A&E will come make a TV show about people who actually know how to renovate and flip houses...

After that, I'm not really sure. What about you, what would you do if you won the lottery?

I started stashing the change and dollar bills from my allowance 10/12. Here's my progress:

----------------------------------------------
PREVIOUS TOTAL
----------------------------------------------
  $78.23 total as of 11/2
- $ 0.00 reward for

1W1G #3 (I didn't make it on time!)
--------
  $78.23
----------------------------------------------
THIS WEEK
----------------------------------------------
  $10.00 dollar bills
  $ 4.75 quarters
  $ 1.40 dimes
  $ 0.15 nickels
  $ 0.20 pennies
--------
  $16.50 total this week
----------------------------------------------
  $94.73 total as of 11/07

You might not know this, but I like coffee Hey, I even managed to keep a straight face while I typed that!

Anyways, I wanted to share some easy ways to have coffee-shop coffee right at home. Unless you're anywhere near I live, in which case you need to come by my dad's coffe shop

First things first, buy coffee you like and know you will enjoy. Just my opinion here: non-flavored will be your better bet because it will give you more options when it comes to adding flavor later. Coffee stays fresher if you buy it in bean form and grind it yourself, but we all know that's not always an option. Instead, keep ground coffee in an airtight container in either the fridge or freezer (this will also work for your beans, too, BTW).

OK, first tip for interesting coffee: mix cocoa powder in with your grounds before you brew. One tablespoon per full pot should work, more or less depending on your taste. MIX IT UP WELL, as the powder just sitting on top of the coffee may result in your coffee not dripping properly and over-flowing onto the counter!!! You can of course try this with any ground spice you like (cinnamon comes to mind, or a bit of ground vanilla bean). Experiment.

For an at home mocha: keep hot cocoa mix at home, and make the cocoa as directed but use coffee instead of milk or water. Even yummier: mix the liquid up in a measuring cup or something you can pour from. Take a coffee cup and fill it about 3/4 the way with whipped cream (real stuff from a can works great). Pour the hot coffee mix over the whipped cream, and you have a mocha cappucino! YUM!!!

Another thing to try: extracts. A drop or two of peppermint oil, almond extract, vanilla, etc can do wonders for a cup of coffee.

Try making your own flavored creamers: get a container of half 'n' half and try making vanilla creamer, cinnamon hazelnut, buttered almond, etc. Extracts and spices are all fair game here, but if you use spices you may want to LIGHTLY heat them in the half 'n' half to get more flavor.

Make your own Chocolate Spoons (great for company or gift giving). Buy spoons from a dollar store, otherwise you'll use up all your regular ones! Carefully melt chocolate chips in the microwave (follow the directions on the bag), swirl the spoon in the melted chocolate and place on wax paper to harden. VIOLA, something chocolatey to stir into your coffee!

Search online for a biscotti recipe: there are oodles. Make up a big batch and store them in an airtight container so they stay crisp.

What about all of you? How do you make coffee-shop coffee at home?

Hehehehe!!! Lucky Robin made a comment on one of my earlier entries about the FlyLady hiding dishes under the sink in order to have a tidier kitchen. First thought I had "Isn't that what the dishwasher's for?" (Note, I don't actually have a dishwasher, but that is what I thought).

Next, though, were flashbacks to May of 2005, and they were just too funny so I thought I would share them and give all the frugies a good chuckle.

April 2005 was a busy month. DH turned in his resignation to his job and I got asked to fly to Argentina for work. For a month. With 2 weeks notice. Busy.

At any rate, I was running around like a chicken with my head cut off getting things ready to go and DH offered to do the dishes. No problem, I'll take him up on that.

The dishes sat. Days upon days they sat. I would wash the dishes I personally needed and hide them when I was done so they would be clean and ready when I needed them again. I didn't wash the rest b/c DH said he would do them. I can be stubborn when I need to be, and I wasn't going to loose this one.

The time came for me to fly to Argentina at the end of April. I left the bills ready to be mailed and a calendar with dates to mail them, important contact info, etc. DH was taking this month off since he'd just resigned his job so he would have plenty of time to get everything around the house taken care of. (he wound up starting a new job the week after I got back so don't everyone freak out here).

Fast forward to Memorial Day weekend.

I've had a long month abroad: fun but tiring. Due to a scheduling SNAFU I missed my flight home and spent a night sleeping on a bench in the Buenos Aires airport. It was like the movie 'Terminal': I don't recommend trying to live it. Another long night flying from Santiago, Chile to Atlanta (OK, it wasn't that long cause I was in 1st class, but that's beside the point!!), and then a short flight home.

DH greets me at the gate, shuttles me off to the car, and takes me to a pancake breakfast. I eat like a mad-woman: an American breakfast, in an American dinner, with people all around me speaking American, er, English! As I'm polishing off the last of my obscene plate of food, DH says he has a prize for me at home. Woohoo, a prize!!!

We get to the house, and my prize is: clean dishes, silverwear, and glasses, clean towels, and fresh sheets on the bed. See, my mom had told him that the thing I would want when I got home would be to come home to a clean house and a good night's sleep in my own bed on clean sheets. Hey, she was close

At any rate, apparently DH realized the day before I got back there was no way he could get everything done. So, he went out and bought new dishes, silverwear, glasses, towels, and sheets.

Some of you have probably already figured out his ruse, as I did. Rather than washing the dishes that were sitting in the sink when I left the country, he literally piled them in a Rubbermaid, threw them in the trash, and bought everything new!! The months worth of towels and the sheets that had been on the bed? Hidden in his closet...

The good news? I really hated the old dishes (they were his ex-wife's Fiesta) and absolutely adore the white Correlle he bought to replace them!

Frequent readers will note I'm still using the term 'our', rather than 'mine' or 'his' *g*

Anywho, I've been giving some thought to the pitiful negative net worth of my household. Bluh!!! I think this is something I want to rectify during 2007: I wanna get in the black!



OK, so there it is. Yes, it's a copy of the same image from a previous post. Sue me (hehehe, why would you, you can see you wouldn't get anything!)

So, here are my thoughts on the fastest way to get into the black on my net-worth. Interestingly enough, they're not necessarily the ones that will save the most when it comes to paying out interest, so I guess I need to decide which is going to motivate me (and of course DH) the most....

1. Pay off DH's old Honda Card. This is our highest interest rate and would almost put us in the black on it's own. Woohoo, two birds with one stone baby! For those that are curious, the Honda Card was for a 4-wheeler DH bought about 5 yrs ago, before I met him. He sold it right after we met and the cash from the sale was spent long before I even knew it was financed, leaving us with this zombie-like bill. GAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!

2. If we can pay off the hospital: POOF, we're in the black!!! Only downside to this is that the hospital is at a lower interest rate than every other debt we have. Tricky, eh?

I dunno, I think I'll chat w/ DH and see which way he would like to go. Then again, he still hasn't reviewed the 'financial report' he asked for, so he may have no clue what I'm talking about

By 10p Tuesday 11/14 I will...

Finish last week's goal of organizing the pantry! Also, I will create a viable schedule for reining in the household chores.

I actually have a schedule, but it was set-up for the rental house we used to live in. 900 sqft vs 1700. 1 story vs 2. 1 bathroom vs 2. No stairs, half the windows, yadda yadda yadda... I feel like I'm drowning!

At any rate, I'm tired of playing catchup so to speak, so I'm going to sit down and figure out what has to get done for my particular comfort level. And no, I'm not too worried about DH's comfort level: he's fine as long as there's a path from the door to his chair...

One day I might get brave and post pictures of that chair, but I'm afraid the blog police might fine me for posting something so unpleasant!

Read about My "One Week, One Goal" quest here

Also, visit the new thread

Text is "What is Your Goal This Week?" and Link is http://www.savingadvice.com/forums/showthread.php?t=22948

"What is Your Goal This Week?" to see what other folks are doing!

Text is The Goal: and Link is http://tinapbeana.savingadvice.com/2006/10/31/one-week-one-goal-3_16543/

The Goal:
By 10p Tuesday 11/7 I will...

Clean out and organize my fridge, freezer, and pantry.

The Result:
bah! I got the fridge and freezer done (it was interesting, I'll give it that), but the pantry fell by the wayside. See, I had bought a bunch of meat on sale and had to package it up and get it in the freezer, which added to my freezer organization task.

Turns out my freezer is full almost to the bursting point: I even have a shelf that is trying to sag and break! Moral of the story: can't buy any more meat on sale until we whittle away the 7 species we currently have on ice!

Text is The Reward: and Link is http://tinapbeana.savingadvice.com/2006/10/23/1w1g-rules-update_16073/

The Reward:
No reward for me

*** UPDATE ***
Last night, DH asked if I could send him a 'financial report' every month. This is what he got today: wonder if it'll help?



YAY, FEEDBACK!!! I appreciate everyone taking the time to read my rants and then go through the effort of organizing and thoughtfully sharing your input. And yes, I am being serious...

On a side note: apparently my rants about DH are even more popular than the ones about StarCrooks, as yesterday was the new biggest ever for pages viewed. Way to Rant, TinaP!!!

Since I got so many comments, questions, and suggestions, I wanted to place my response in a new post in hopes that everyone would be able to follow-along and offer more help if possible.

"LuxLiving Says: My first thoughts are to save this as a last resort measure. "

Oh yea, this is definitely a last resort measure. I was even leery of putting it on the blog since there are thoughts DH is reading this as we 'speak'. But, I promised I wouldn't censor myself, so I laid it out there!

"LuxLiving Says: ... Once he gets a taste that you're trying to cover all the bases don't you think he'll come around?"

Well, I've tried that to an extent. He's seen the spread sheet & therefore knows that there's money left over after I save for the quarterly, semi-annual, and annual bills (plus holidays & gifts). It's what to do with the 1100 leftover that's causing issues: I have no retirement plan at work so I'd like to fund a Roth, plus agressively pay down existing debt after creating a baby EF. It's not that DH is against any of these things, but he has no qualms about using that money for something tangible in the here & now. Retirement to him isn't tangible, and he doesn't want to pay the debt aggresively. His view is "it'll get taken care of eventually". My view is: add up the car, the house, and what we pay each month in other debts, you get over $1000. If we could pay of our debts and keep our current income, we could have over $2000 each month to save and enjoy. But that's in the future, it's not now and it's not tangible.

"yummy64 Says: Slowly make the savings a bill - it comes out of the account automattically when you are paid. Money sitting around in accounts is money to be spent - see it spend it..."

Actually, we already have a 'savings bill'. $150 goes out the 3rd and 18th of every month (3 days after I get paid) to cover the quarterly, semi-annual, and annual bills (plus holidays & gifts). Plus I'm sending $200/wk to the online savings account. It's the money sitting in savings that is so tempting to DH. We have themoney, it's right there 'not being used', so why not use it to buy X?

"Lynda Says: ... It's easier to not spend money when you feel like you are getting something of value for your efforts. Maybe seeing how one level of savings has him working until 60+ and another has you both free and clear and done with work in his 40's would be a way to become more united on your savings goals...."

This ties back to what I mentioned earlier: retirement isn't tangible to DH and therefore I don't think he finds planning and saving for it as emotionally rewarding as, well, stuff.

"PRICEPLUS Says: Tina, I like the idea of making savings a bill. It is sooooo important to save before kiddies come around!"

Savings bill (1100 per month) is already done. It's just that he wants to tap into it whenever something fun/new comes along. As for kiddies, we currently don't intend on having any. We both like kids and are very good with them, but DH's very open about the fact that he's selfish when it comes to both me (i.e. not wanting to share his time with me) and money. He's even broughtup the V word...

"PRICEPLUS Says: ... The "MY" money and "YOUR" money idea is fine if you decided it before marriage! You and hubby are a team and the operative word is "OUR" money...."

It always has been 'our' money, but so far that's going over like a turd in a punch bowl. Pardon the phrase, but the picture is clear.

"PRICEPLUS Says: ... The Mine and Yours gambit should only be used when the financial house is teetering and there is no other choice. An allowance of mad money should be set aside for both of you and the rest into savings or reducing debt!..."

DH already gets an allowance, as do I. His allowance is 11.90% of the household income, mine is 9.52%. It's what to do with money above and beyond, the actual monthly surplus, that's causing friction.

"frugalmomof1 Says: ...Have you showed him the newly formatted budget? When he sees that your surplus is nearly 10x's more than his, maybe his tune will change."

I haven't shown him the newly formatted budget b/c I'm not sure if it's appropriate. It really does make it look like my money versus his money, as opposed to 'our' money, which I'm trying to avoid if at all possible.

"Broken Arrow Says: ... Having said that, if he is comfortable with it, and if he's willing to agree with it, the simplest solution is to for you to give him a (percentage) cash allowance every pay period. This is his "car gas/play money". In return, he doesn't have to worry about any bills or debts anymore, provided that he's not going to push for more money. Oh, and he would also have to surrender his paychecks to you...."

We've been doing this for about 2 years now, actually. To give you a picture of what it was like before I took over the finances: a year and a half ago DH was carrying 2 check advances and owed his sister for a title loan on her car. I managed to wipe those out in a few months, and put him on an allowance. He has no car payment, gas bill, or cell bill as all those are covered by work. His allowance is truly fun money...

"Broken Arrow Says: ... Specifically, we split all the bills down to whatever we knew we could handle."

Sadly, the bills are all in my name b/c DH has/had bad accounts at all the major utilities. Most have been taken care of by now, but the utilities were established in my name long before he could get accounts.

"janh Says: ...After the accounts build up, would you have to remind him that it is for a specific thing or would he want to spend it on something else? I guess I wonder this cos this is my DS to a "T." I think he is beginning to come around and negotiate more for things they each want--him a toy, her saving for something..."

Unfortunately, that's the difficulty. DH doesn't want to save for a specific thing. 'The money is right there in savings, why not just use it: that's what money's for, right?'. Last night he wanted to research what it would cost to go to one of the Racing Experience schools at a NASCAR track (it's actually less than we thought, but prices range from $200-5k!!!). I told him that if it's what he wants we'll save up for it, just give me 6 months and I can make it happen. We could even make that his every-event present for 2007 and go big on it. First thing he said is: "Why not just use my tax refund? That would cover most of it, and we can do the taxes in Feruary and get the money more quickly!"

"pjmama Says: ... Make sure you tell him why you feel it is so important, and perhaps he will come around."

I don't know if he will come around: I'm thinking of future stability and paying past debt, and he's very much in the here and now. =/

"baselle Says: ... I think you'll have to make your debt reduction, savings goals, and emergency fund replenishment additional line items in your budget and rebalance your individual budgets so that each of you will have about 10-15% discretionary."

Well, we do already have discretionary budget, and we've alraedy talked about what our tolerances are for an EF (which was a nice discussion, very adult and honest and all that jazz). Debt reduction is the big issue: he doens't see the point. When I told him I could pay the car off in 2 years and save 6k in interest he actually said "But you don't need to think of it like that, think what you could do with that $300 every month". ACK!!!!

"baselle Says: ... The other chat you need to have is the 'want' chat. Ask DH to list out his Christmas list. Are they things that only he'll enjoy or things that you'll both enjoy? Will it possble that by waiting you'll get a better deal or that you can combine wants? If DH digs electronics, that happens quite a bit. Ask DH how he (or you both) will use his wants..."

I've been telling him for abotu a year "put it on the list!", but he thinks I'm kidding! Sometimes it just feels like DH wants everything, all at once. Sometimes his desire for something passes, sometimes the desire passes after the purchase is made (like the canoe he's "wanted" for 20 years that's currently in the den).

"baselle Says: ... It sounds like he chaffing under the bit, perhaps feels a bit "whipped". Is he getting teased?"

Actually, DH tells anyone he can how good I am with our money, and freely admits he's better off with me taking care of it than he would be doing it himself. He just told me last night how proud he is of how I handle our finances. I don't get it!!! As for his friends: most of them come to us for loans b/c they 'know' we're in a position with some liquid cash on hand. No teasing that I'm aware of...

"LuckyRobin Says: ... Price--What is it they say, something about if you really want to catch flies, use a dead possum. I've seen that posted somewhere around here. "

HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHHAHAHAHA!!! Needed that!


"LuxLiving Says: Tinapbeane - Here's the sentence I use (very nicely - not snidely) with The Hubster and my kids: "And how are you planning to pay for that?" WAIT... WAIT..... WAIT FOR IT.... 'Oh I hadn't even thought about THAT!" GEE Willikers Peeps!! I always wag my head about then!"

The response I've heard is something to the effect of "How can I pay for anything if you're the only one with the checkbook?"... Feels like DH is happy w/ how I handle finances when it gets bill collectors to stop calling him and when it reduces our overall debt-load, but unhappy with how I handle finances when it keeps him from buying what he wants when he wants it. Don't know if that's true or not, but that's how it feels.

"LuxLiving Says: ...Could you work with him on making a list of the things he wants? At some point you might be able to convince him that he can't have everything he wants. None of us can...we wouldn't have anywhere to put it all. Could you post a list on the frig "Hubby's Want List" with the numbers 1-5 already listed on it and no room on the paper for a number 6 or more? Tell him you'll help him save to get his wants fulfilled but if he comes up with more than 5 that something else will have to be crossed off the list...."

Like I said earlier, I don't think he believes me when I tell him "put it on the list!" And I do think it's a good idea (esp since it makes gift buying so much easier...), but at the same time DH's wants are running about 500-1500 a pop. I don't think I could afford to save for 5 of 'em!

"LuxLiving Says: ...We all have to learn to prioritize at some point, maybe this is a skill he hasn't quite yet mastered?..."

I dunno. He's parents are not well off and are very frugal in their own way. At the same time, he was the youngest and the only boy and got treated like an only child in a lot of ways. I think that's what hasn't been outgrown...

"LuxLiving Says: ...Once you've explained that there is no money left for play because all of these OTHER things have to be covered then it is easier for folks to understand why there are no $$'s today to play with...."

And that's part of the issue. After all current needs & obligations are meet there's 1k that burns a hold in DH's mental pocket. I want to use some of that for my retirement fund (he just set up his 401k at work, whereas my work doesn't offer one), and some to pay off debt. These apparently are in no way a priority for DH. At least, he doesn't act or speak like they are.

DH has even decided to use some of his allowance to got througha credit rehab program where you pay $100 and they promise X many points up in your score blah blah blah. It's a load of crap: you know this, and I know this, and I've told him this. But, I've also told him if that's what he wants to do with his allowance it's his money. My question is: Why not just pay your old debt? You owe the money, and we have money that I'm offering to use for that specific purpose?

This is where my confusion lies. DH says he wants to pay down our debt and not owe money to his parents or his Honda Card or the hospital or whatever. But he's not willing to see me send any more out the door to try and reach that goal, he wants the money here where it is in theory usable. My perspective, in contrast, is that since we owe X many people/companies money, our 'extra' $1000 per month is really ours right now, it belongs to the people we owe money to and the grown up thing to do is give it to them.

Again, I appreciate your time and feedback, and I welcome even more in this next round of Tina the Budget Bad-Guy.

Loyal readers, I'm turing to you for advice and/or suggestions.

As some of you might have gathered, my DH is not the most budget minded person *g* While he is making progress, the list of 'I would really like to have's is getting longer and longer. I feel I have the budget under control thus far, but I'm also preparing myself for when/if things get stickier.

DH's finances have been melded with mine since we started living together. He admits money isn't is strong suite and asked me to take care of it. I happily accepted. When we got married, I took 'for better or worse' to include, among other things, the fact that I was now responsible for debt other than my own. So was he, of course.

After I started my new job and drafted a new budget, the finances worked in such a fashion that all our needs and obligations could be met on my pay alone. DH's contribution to the household kitty (everything other than his allowance and our benefits) could then be used for saving, debt reduction, what-have-you. I think the mistake I made is phrasing it to him in exactly this fashion, and now somewhere in the back of his mind is the thought that we can make it AOK on just my salary and therefore his money can be play money if 'needed'. I don't know if that's the case or not, but it's what I think.

So, I have sat down with our budget and divided the expenses. Splitting shared items (house, utilities, groceries), and alotting our individual debts, well, individually. For instance, I'm allotted the car payment and its property taxes b/c it's in my name, we split the auto insurance b/c it covers both of us, that sort of thing.

After looking at the budget in this fashion, DH's salary covers his expenses with $100 to spare, mine are covered with $950 to spare.

The quandry I am in: if DH pushes the 'we have money let's spend it' argument in the future, should I bring up the fact that he's actually wanting to spend my money? Would it be appropriate for me to offer to give him his surplus every month to do with as he sees fit (i.e. take responsibility for it, good or bad) as long a I get to save my surplus as I see fit?

Lemme know what you think, readers. My inquiring mind wants to know!

These paint fumes are killing me! My head is spinning, my tummy is upset (but that might just be the 7 bags of candy corn...): I gotta get outta here!

I brought beef stew and mashed potato left-overs to heat'n'eat today, but I don't think I can do it. The kitchen is right next to the office being painted and some small part of me thinks the microwave might in fact ignite the fumes! *g* Honestly, though, I can't sit in here and eat like I want to, I'm going to have to head out somewhere.

And, alas, since there is no-where open that will allow me to heat'n'eat my leftovers, I'm going to have to spring for lunch. Bah! So much for the possibility of another no-spend day!

Aside: Heat'n'Eat would be a great name for the amorphous brown-bag welcoming business I mentioned in a previous blog entry. BA, if I buy you ice cream, will you front me the money to start a chain of Heat'n'Eats? *g*