Just because you're driving a Beemer doesn't mean you can ignore all traffic laws, not to mention common decency!
Today during my 20 minute lunch hour, I went to get a cuppa joe. I was happily sitting at a red-light in the right-most left turn lane listening to NPR, and you Mr. Beemer Butt Munch were on my right in the 'go straight' lane. There was traffic everywhere.
When our light changed, I and the car to my left both began making our left turns when you, MR. BEEMER BUTT MUNCH, gun your engine and make a swinging left turn in front of me from a NON-LEFT TURN LANE!!!
You are a lucky rat bastard that I know how to drive and do it well, otherwise me, you, and the car to my left would have all wound up on the news tonight. Bad news for you, Mr. Beemer Butt Munch, because the county sherrif, a state trooper, and a SLED agent are all loyal cigar store customers!
I know for a fact you saw me. I drive an 'Egg Yolk Yellow' Ford Focus, for cryin' out loud, how could you not see me?!??
Granted, I know this car does not scream "EFFECTIVE DRIVER" or "FINANCIALLY RESPONSIBLE", but beleive it or not that is WHY I DRIVE IT! I drive this car so my property taxes will be lower, my gas bill will be lower, and I can afford a $250 deductible and 100 grand in liability coverage in case I ever happen to run into a MR. BEEMER BUTT MUNCH such as yourself.
I admit, I was sorely tempted by you today, Butt Munch. I had a golden opportunity 5 feet from my front bumper. My car would have been totalled, but I have GAP insurance which would have paid off my loan in full. Your car would have been totalled, but me, the guy to my left, and the 50 other cars at that intersection (NOT TO MENTION THE FREAKIN' TRAFFIC CAMERAS) all would have stated it was your fault.
I could have made your life miserable today, Mr. Beemer Butt Munch, and I chose not to. Next time, why don't you try and do the same?